On the Way to Wonder

John 21

Have you ever had one of those days? Or even weeks?  I realize so many people in our world live under terrible circumstances with war and persecution but my week felt like overload!  One toilet overflowed, flooding the laundry and running out to carport before we caught it.  Other toilet kept me busy with clean up from medical stuff my husband is going through.  Yesterday I was running between toilets as one running water and other occupied by a mess.  Of course there was a seizure first thing in the morning and a huge storm that knocked out the electricity in our house all evening.  Did I mention the trip to Urgent Care and then Dr. midweek?

         I can just imagine Peter being overwhelmed with all the events of Easter, with the guilt of his own failure, and with the confusion of how Jesus was now communicating.  Overwhelmed people often give snappy, snarky answers quickly.  We don’t want to be questioned and work so  hard to keep up a good face to the public.

         In the midst of that Peter goes fishing with friends, fails, Jesus gives advice and of course is right, and Peter gets to shore to eat breakfast with Jesus around a fire that already had fish roasting.  I think there must have been a huge storm of emotions within Peter.  Jesus asks Peter a question, “Peter, do you love me?”  The obvious right answer in public is “yes.”  Jesus knows and Peter knows the turmoil that masks.  Three times Jesus asks Peter, “Do you love me?”  Peter realizes that Jesus has brought up the three times Peter denied Jesus at the trial and Peter responds, “Lord, you know all!”

         During hard times when just keeping our head above water and giving the polite answer “I’m fine” to questions, seems like the best thing to do.  Jesus spoke into Peter’s dynamic and ours.  The important question is how perfect we are but do we love him.  Jesus does not lecture about our mistakes like a parent.  He redirected Peter from looking at the past and pointed his eyes to the future.  “Feed my sheep.”  Perhaps the lesson for us to learn to today is that in the midst of our struggles when our loves is dicey, Jesus still comes to us and loves us and can use us.  Thank you, Lord!

John 21

Two books deeply impacted my thinking about transitional time.  David Shapiro and Richard Leider  wrote Claiming Your Place at the Fire and Repacking Your Bags: Lightening Your Load for the Good Life.  Both men work in the Gerontology (Aging) Dept. at the U of MN.  I heard them speak years ago and grabbed their books.  They led safaris of mature people who wanted to trek the plains of Kenya and give themselves space to think and detox from their lives.  The books talk about gathering around the campfire at night and the author notes how the elders position themselves.  The elder, wiser men sat near the flame and all shared.

         The basic thesis is that we all carry three bags: a big suitcase, an overnight bag, and a brief case.  These hold the different themes of our lives.  When we come to a transitional point in our life like retirement or perhaps marriage, we need to draw aside and evaluate the “tools” in our bag and whether they are needed for the next phase.  One of the words I’m hearing friends use is “declutter.”  We need to discard that which no longer gets us where we want to go and then repack.

         The risen Jesus has called from the shore to the seven disciples who have fished all night and caught nothing.  Throw the nets on the other side, he advises.  They catch a haul and realize it is Jesus and get themselves to shore.  What does Jesus do?  He gathers them around a campfire for sharing.  He has the fish cooked and it ready to chat.  The dynamic, though, is that the disciples are in a “liminal space” or a transition time.  They are going from Jesus present physically and teaching through parables to Jesus risen and sending the Holy Spirit.  They need to repack their bags.  Somethings need to be discarded and new tools need to be added.

         As we spend time now to pray and reflect, a question to ask the Holy Spirit is for clarifications on whether we have “baggage,” habits, attitudes for dealing with life that are not serving us well.  Are there things that would tweak you spiritually as you seek to draw near to God?  We are always growing and learning and God helps us best to do that.  Blessings as you sit around the fire with Jesus today.

John 21:7-14

John continues relating this Easter scene with a very detailed report of the fishing outcome.  “The disciple whom Jesus loved,” recognizes that Jesus is calling to them from the shore.  The seven disciples had fished all night and caught nothing. A man on the shore tells them to throw their nets on the other side.  Their nets are full and the lights go on.  It is Jesus.  John continues to describe Peter putting on his clothes so that he could jump in the water and get to the shore faster.  Usually we take off our clothes before we jump in water.  On shore a fire with roasted fish met them.  Jesus does not need the disciples catch!! But Jesus asks how many fish were in the haul.  153!  Jesus feeds the disciples from his resources, not from the catch of fish.  I just chuckle, chuckle, chuckle.

         It sounds like a cat bringing a mouse to the master but in fact, the master loves the cat with or without the mouse.  How often do we think our actions support our worth to the Lord?  The bigger the church, the more people in the congregation, the more fantastic the praise team we deem as “success.”  In the scene, the disciples caught fish only because Jesus was directing, his wisdom brought success.  We live by grace.  The 153 fish were not needed for breakfast.  Jesus feeds us from his resources, not from ours.  We live by his Word, not ours.  Peter clothed himself to jump in the water and to reach Jesus.  Jesus accepts us just as we are and knows who we are with or without clothes.  We don’t need to dress up our act spiff for him..

So which of these three points touches you today

• God gets the credit for suggesting the other side – grace
• God does not need my resources to feed people – scripture
• God know everything about me without dressing up – transparency

Take a moment to thank God for ways he has fed you this week!  Was there a serendipitous moment that fed your soul?  Is there some spot of guilt that you think is hidden from God that needs to be brought to the table?

Blessings.

John 21:6

Seven disciples have fished all night and caught nothing.  Jesus is quietly standing  on the shore – watching, not absent.  The disciples are so focused on the fishing that they don’t recognize him.  Finally Jesus calls to the exhausted men. “Friends, haven’t you any fish!”  They are called into voice to admit they caught nothing.  Jesus continues, “Throw your net on the right side of the boat and you will find some.”  I think we see a common cycle here.  It is so easy to be so focused on what we are attempting to do that we do not even realize Jesus is close by, letting us do things “our way.”  Then we are finally able to admit that we have failed, need help and remember to pray, Jesus is then able to speak into our lives about how to make it successful.

     What might be an example as most of us are not fishermen?  Movies love to portray this kind of reversal.  I think of Lion King.  Simba, the son, is told not to go into the land of the hyenas but disobeys and has to be rescued by his father.  After his father’s death, he runs away in failure.  Nula confronts him with the need to think differently, to return and rescue the kingdom.  He has to confront his failure.  Another example is when we read motives and feelings into another’s actions that offend us but when we sit down and talk, we discover they are having a hard day about something entirely different and you just got in the way.  You can then shake hands and be friends again.

     Christianity challenges us to try God’s way and to not demand on our way.  We are called to forgive, to share, and to go the extra mile.  We are to pray for our enemies and share our resources.  As you sit today and focus on faith, listen for God’s voice saying, “Throw your net on the other side!”  His way will always work out for the best in the long run.  It may not mean health, wealth, and prosperity for there are many martyrs but being at peace with a God who is risen and watching and guiding is always a good choice.  Blessings.

John 21: 3

“Let’s go fishing,” was Peter’s strategy for waiting for Jesus to appear again.  He and six others spent the night fishing.  Many times we slog along in life doing what we know how to do until our next “insight” comes.  The disciples were used to being with Jesus, following him around, helping him with his ministry, soaking in his presence.  But Easter meant Jesus was alive but they did not seem to have his everyday presence.  Something had changed.  Reality had changed in more than one way.  Jesus was resurrected and so his presence had changed.  But the disciples had changed too.  The story we ponder this week speaks to those times when we are in the midst of reorientation to a new norm.  The disciples went back to fishing, something they knew how to do, but… “but that night they caught nothing.”

     John does not write cause-and-effect into these first three verses.  He does not insinuate that the disciples were running away or being lazy, but what he does do is set the scene that replicates a similar encounter with Jesus when the disciples had fished all night and caught nothing.  We the reader see the similarity.  Have you had one of those times when you felt like, “been there and done that” … and it still doesn’t work!  After a second disastrous engagement, I had to start asking myself what I was doing wrong that I came up with same heartbreak.  My failure led me to reflect and evaluate how I was facing into the future.  “ Einstein once said that insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result.”

         So reflect, where have you come up empty handed recently?  Perhaps it was not that you did anything wrong but that God is seeking to interact with you.  Where might God’s hand be in the situation?  Is there something that needs to be tweaked?  A good prayer is to ask the Holy Spirit to open your eyes, open your ears, and open your heart to see Jesus acting in your situation that is challenging you.  Blessings as you look for Him.

John 21:1-3

After the high of any exciting event comes the low of reality.  A proposal comes but then you have to choose china.  He thought I’d like big red flowers like my mother’s but I wanted small, delicate blue flowers!  Easter was a day full of intense spiritual experiences.  The tomb was empty, women encountered Jesus, two on the road to Emmaus walked and talked with him, and then he appears in the room where they huddled in fear behind locked doors trying to figure themselves out.  That was a lot for them to take in.  A spiritual experience, as wonderful as it may have been, then has to be incorporated into everyday life.  Jesus is alive and people have experienced that reality but now what?  The followers were told to return to Galilee and wait.  Ordinary days follow special days.

         “’I’m going out to fish,” Simon Peter told them, and they said, ‘We’ll go with you.’”  Seven disciples led by Peter decide to go fishing.  That is logical as they had been fishermen.  We all have activities that help us unwind and help us wait while dinner cooks, till the kids come home, till the disease runs its course, till peace is achieved.  We wait for others to do their thing and for events to unfold.  It is easy to fill a void with noise, with activity or with anything that preoccupies our minds from events.

         So what do you like to do?  Watch TV, knit, cook, shop, fish, walk, hunt, chat on the phone?  None of these are bad.  I suppose the question is whether the activity is helping us to detox, to unwind, to think or is it just filling time?  One of the complaints about quiet times and prayers is that it is hard to stay focused because our minds wander to things that need to be done or to rehashing experiences we are dealing with.  One device to help focus is a labyrinth.  Tracing a finger through the maze seems to help focus the mind.  Another trick is to keep a pad of paper and write down distracting thoughts so they can be dealt with later.  Sometimes as we do something we love to do like fishing, our mind is freed up to ponder our situation.  I don’t know what helps you but making space for the Holy Spirit to speak into your life, is always good.  Blessings as you go to your favorite unwind place or activity!

John 20:26

“Peace be with you.”

When Jesus appeared to his followers that first Easter evening and then the following Sunday again, the first thing he said was, “Peace be with you.”  That phrase has kept coming back to me this week as I have faced various challenges.  As I listen to the news, I certainly don’t hear words of  peace.  A friend had a long operation for a large heart aneurism near an aorta.  I was anxious so I can only imagine how her husband felt having lost his first wife to illness.  The author of this hymn wrote it after the death of his four children in a ship catastrophe crossing the Atlantic.  The mother lived.  The next born son died of scarlet fever!  The man who wrote the music for the hymn went on a train ride with his wife.  A bridge collapsed and he crawled back to die with his wife trapped in the wreckage.  So much tragedy.  And we have not mentioned Ukraine!  What is this “peace” that Jesus breathed on his followers?

         Peace cannot be the absence of conflict or tragedy or sorrow!  Jesus said in John 14:27, “Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled, and do not let them be afraid.”  If I had to rewrite Jesus’ words into words that would comfort me, I would write, “It’s OK.  I’m right here with you.  Take my hand.  I’m with you and you don’t need to be afraid!”  It’s OK, I’m with you.  He doesn’t erase me by doing for me but he honors me by walking with me.  What words would you like Jesus to say to you today?  Blessings.  It’s OK!

John 20: 28-29

²⁸ Thomas answered him, ‘My Lord and my God!’ 

²⁹ Jesus said to him, ‘Have you believed because you have seen me? Blessed are those who have not seen and yet have come to believe.’

Judas doubted, betrayed Jesus and committed suicide.  Thomas doubted, demanded proof, touched and felt, and bowed in faith.  Faith is a journey.  Some paint that journey as an in-out decision made in a spiritual moment.  You believe or you don’t.  For many, though, it is a process.  Are we moving towards God, asking our questions as we seek a relationship to which we bow and build a life around?  The question is whether we are moving toward God, seeking him, or running from him, denying the truth of Jesus’ identity.  Another way I’ve heard it explained is faith by “management” or “mystery.”  Management keeps track of our sins and the facts of Jesus where as mystery enjoys an unfolding journey of a deepening relationship that gets “sweet.”  Each person in that room at Easter had to deal with fear, with doubt and with the realities of life on the other side of the locked door.

     We all have a locked door to keep our fears out.  Some of us will see Jesus clearly and be blessed.  Jesus says, “Blessed are those who have not seen and yet have come to believe.”  Some of us will have visions, speak in tongues and touch the divine but many days we plod along clinging to our faith, believing because we know he is real in the midst of the chaos of the world.  May we not be guilty of doubting in the night what was revealed in the day!

         Let us use our devotional time this morning to thank God for the ways he has blessed our lives and shown himself real.  Focus on the words, “Lord” and “God.”  What does that mean to you?  Thank you Lord for appearing and inviting me to touch and feel as you speak into my reality, today!

John 20:26-27

²⁶ A week later his disciples were again in the house, and Thomas was with them.

Although the doors were shut, Jesus came and stood among them and said,

‘Peace be with you.’ 

²⁷ Then he said to Thomas, ‘Put your finger here and see my hands.

Reach out your hand and put it in my side.

Do not doubt but believe.’

Wish granted!  Thomas has waited.  Thomas has witnessed the risen Christ.  A week later, still behind locked doors, the followers gather but this time Thomas is present.  Jesus came.  This time Thomas is the focus.  Very much like the first visit, Jesus first tells everyone to calm down.  He breathes peace.  For Thomas that means that all the doubt and regret, all the rebellion against his friends and saying he would not believe “until,” disappears. Perhaps it was like that breathing exercise to deal with stress. We are told  to sit in a chair, hands on knees, relax and… “breath out” whatever stresses and “breath in” peace, or love, or calm.  It is scientifically shown that doing this breathing exercise is good for our health.  Jesus first has his followers relax.

         Again they are told to touch and feel.  As we relax we can more accurately enter the experience that has us stressed out.  Touch and feel is like focusing on the details.  But interestingly Jesus continues on to say, “do not doubt but believe.”  Jesus juxtaposes doubt with belief or faith.  So my question today is to ponder what Jesus wanted Thomas and us to believe.  What doubts are we to release to Jesus and what are we called to believe about our challenges today?

      Most obviously I am called to believe that Jesus is alive and working in the circumstances that confront me.  I may not be in Ukraine, in the hospital, at the bank but I believe Jesus is.  In the midst of whatever trauma is facing me, Jesus is alive and actually present whether I see him or not.  I do not see that Thomas was commanded to believe that Jesus would eliminate the challenge, the potential danger, or the implications for the future.

         As we sit this morning let us practice our breathing.  Breath out the concerns of your heart and breathe in…Thank you Lord, for your presence.  Thank you Lord, for your love.  Thank you Lord, that you are working for good for me and my loved ones.  I believe, help my unbelief!  Blessings.

John 20: 26

December was a rough time for our family years ago.  Our second son was born Dec. 12.  Christmas was Dec. 25.  Our twins were born January 1.  A week was a long time to wait for a birthday…and who’s birthday?  And we tried to treat each twin as an individual.  Sigh.  Apostle Thomas was not with his friends on Easter evening when Jesus appeared as they huddled behind locked doors in fear.  For one week Thomas has felt on the outside of an experience that his good friends had.  I’m sure he wondered if he would meet Jesus and “how much longer” must he wait.

         Waiting is hard.  Thomas did not know for sure he would meet Jesus alive but he must have wanted to.  As much as we hope to meet that baby when it is born, we know there is always the possibility of drama.  We have dreams about what marriage will mean but we don’t know because we have never been there.  So how do we wait for Christmas, for birthdays, for holidays, for bonus checks, for the end of the war, for the mail to come, for the death of a loved one, for…..fill in the blank.  How do you wait?  What fills your mind and your thoughts.  Waiting is hard.

         I do not know what Thomas did while he was waiting but we do know a whole week went by.  A week can feel like eternity.  I’m sure he too wanted to see Jesus alive.  But, he had to wait for God’s time. 

         While waiting, some of us spin stories about the excitement of an encounter.  Some of us try to ignore the anxiety in the pit of our stomach. We eat.  We shop.  We do crafts.  Others cook to prepare for a celebration.  Keeping a positive attitude is important.  Prayer focuses our thoughts on God as our good shepherd who is working for good and who knows the right time and context for our dream to unfold.  Prayer  turns anxiety over to God. That is helpful.  Scripture memorization helps me.  Music that focuses me on God lifts my spirits.  Think of ways you help your soul when you must wait.  We all wait to meet Jesus.   Blessings as you wait on the issues in front of you.